I AM REDEEMED

by
Linda C. Wright

When was the last time you heard the word REDEEMED? I have probably heard that one word more in the past few months that ever in my life. It has taken on special meaning to me and by the time you have finished reading this story maybe you will have a new understanding of the word as well.

You see, a few months ago my 29-year old daughter transcended from the life on earth as we know it to her mansion in the sky, taking her rightful place with her heavenly father. She had been on a long arduous journey for nearly three years. It was a journey that was sometimes frightening, sometimes painful but always hopeful and inspirational to all that knew her.

If I may, Id like to take a moment to introduce you to our Carrie. She was a fun-loving wife, mother, daughter and friend. She had the most beautiful smile and a fierce sense of independence. At times her stubborn streak could be aggravating but, one thing for sure you always knew exactly where you stood with Carrie Chambers. She did not bite her tongue or mince words with you. If she had something to say to you and you didnt like it or didnt want to hear it. Oh well, she was going to tell you anyway. There were times when as her mom I wished she would use a little finesse but, she had not yet moved into that season of wisdom.

Truly, as I have contemplated this story the realization has come to me that although she didnt know exactly when her life on earth would end; it was all part of the divine plan for her to leave us at such a young age. She didnt have many years to gain the wisdom of a seasoned woman. But, in the short time she was here she left her mark on many lives. One of her previous employers told me that he thinks of her often and wishes he had six people like Carrie working for him. He didnt realize until she was gone how much she did because she made her job look so easy. Many of her life long friends have great stories to tell. I hope to be able to share a few of them in another story someday. Occasionally Carrie befriended people that no one else would be bothered with. She would always find something good in a person no matter what.

She became an athlete when she entered Rancho High School in 1990. She was a little chubby back then but once she started playing sports she was hooked. Not only did slim down but she was really good at whatever sport she played and that helped build self confidence. If I remember correctly she lettered in three different sports in one year. She was healthy, strong and fit. Even after graduation she continued to play softball and was always active. When she was about three months old I remember one of her Aunts commenting about what a determined child she was. That same spirit stayed with her throughout her life in everything she did. There are so many stories I could tell but they will come in time. It is so important that I move on in this journey.

Carrie found out in September of 2002 that she had Hodgkins Lymphoma. This was after having some pain in her chest for about three months. After her initial trip to Quick Care to get it checked out the doctor had ordered a chest x-ray but the reading came back as normal. She was treated for 30 days with Naprosyn. The pain she described to me sounded like what we used to call pleurisy. She continued to work and didnt complain much.

At the end of the first 30 days she went to our family doctor who gave her another Rx for the same medication. She didnt say too much to me about all of this and I never noticed much change in her routine or her behavior. Another month went by and she went back to the family doctor. He gave her another Rx for the same medication but that particular day she did not have time to go get it filled because she had a special event to attend.

Carrie worked part-time as a nail technician. Twice a year she and several friends worked a trade show at one of the hotels on the strip. She had done this on 3 or 4 occasions and made lots of money in one night so she was always excited to be invited back. She had to be at the hotel by 5 p.m. so she was rushing around to get ready and did not have time to get her Rx filled. She lugged her equipment from the car to the event and sat bent over a manicure table for 5-6 hours. She told me later that when she drove home she was in so much pain in her arm and chest that it made her cry. All she wanted to do was to get home and get into her bed.

The next day we went back to our family doctor and when we talked about what had happened the night before they ordered blood tests. Her white blood count was really high. Enough so that the doctor ordered a CAT Scan of her chest.

I offered to go pick up the results that afternoon and deliver them back to her doctor so he didnt have to wait for the results. I read the radiologists report before I got back to the office and was immediately sick to my stomach. It indicated that she most likely had something called Hodgkins Lymphoma. As a rule I am usually pretty calm in a crisis but I could not believe what I was reading.
The paper I was holding in my hand said that my child probably had cancer. I thought I was going to pass out. By the time I arrived back at the doctors office with the films and the report they receptionist could see in my face that something was terribly wrong. They took me into a room immediately and when the physicians assistant came in to talk to me I handed her the report and told her what I had read asking her to explain it to me. She hesitated because Carrie was an adult, of course and married as well but I believe Charlie used her heart over her head when I told her that I had to go get Carrie and bring her back for a 4:15 appointment to hear the results of this test. I had to be able to prepare myself so I could be strong for her when she heard the news. That was going to be tough to do so I needed a little time to let it sink in for me so I could regroup.

The rest of that day and many of the days that followed are but a blur to me now. We got the news. We prayed for strength and wisdom and healing. We called our church family and the prayer warriors began. They never gave up. They were a source of strength for our family from the moment they found out about Carries Challenge

That evening when we told her husband Earnest he was in shock. It seemed like a really bad dream and we kept praying we would wake up and it would be gone. Not so. It was very real indeed. It was the beginning of a journey that no mother wants to take with her child.

There were specialists to be seen, more tests to be taken and biopsies and surgeries. She was a soldier and was beginning the fight of her life. Once we went to the cancer center and found out exactly what type of cancer she had we had a family meeting with a social worker. All of us went so they could see us and who our family consisted of and so we could hear a plan of action to get our Carrie well.

We asked about the doctors spiritual belief because we felt we had a right to have a doctor that believed in the God we believe in. He did and he told us that if Carrie has to have cancer this was one of the best forms to have because it was 95 urable.

Well, that was it !! It was curable !!!!! Lets get it taken care of, get her well and get her out of there. They gave us the plan. She was to start chemotherapy immediately after getting a port-a-cath surgically inserted into her chest wall and it would continue for several months. She would loose her hair and probably suffer many of the usual side effects of chemotherapy. Well, they didnt know Carrie very well did they?

This young wife and mother grabbed a hold of her faith and never let go from that day until her last day on this earth. She did what the doctors told her to do. She took the tests and the chemotherapy. When the first treatment did not work and they told us she had to go to Arizona for a stem-cell transplant she did it. We thought the family would be separated for nearly three months but God made a way for the children to be with their mom. Earnest and I took turns and we even had friends that helped care for her in Arizona. Not only did He make a way out of no way but the insurance company paid for nearly all the expenses of our stay. Not just the medical bills but for an apartment for the family, food, gas, airline tickets and rental cars to get around. Now I have worked in the medical field and dealt with insurance companies for many years. I have NEVER seen a company do what Sierra Health Services and Culinary Health Insurance and God do for anyone what they did for us so our family could be together and support each other. The children who were three and six years old at the time didnt have to be separated from their mommy. And their presence encouraged her to fight the fight.

Once she returned home many members of our church family would call Carrie or come by and visit bringing something inspirational for her to read and meditate on. The book that she always kept with her besides her Bible was a little paperback entitled Healed of Cancer by Dotie Olsteen. We would read and re-read those scriptures faithfully. A dear family friend shared a personal experience with us that when her husband had a serious illness they read the healing scriptures in that little yellow book out loud three times a day. Her husband was healed of his illness. We are part of a church that deeply believes in the POWER OF PRAYER. We have seen many people healed of diseases and heart problem and diabetes etc. I believe Carrie felt the power of corporate prayer and she was determined to get up and get to church no matter what. Some days she barely had the strength to get out of bed but she would just so she could get to church.

She endured too many tests to count, numerous transfusions, 17 different types of chemotherapy and an autologous stem cell transplant, several occasions of intractable pain that took days to get under control but she never lost hope, she never lost faith in God and she always had an encouraging word for those that loved her when she felt theirs fears. I have said all that to get to the end of this chapter and tell you why as her mother I have been able to endure the gut wrenching pain of loosing a child I love more than life itself.

On July 27, 2005 after recuperating from a trip to Chicago for a family reunion Carrie had a little setback. She ended up in the cardiac ICU at the hospital for four days because two very large lesions on her upper chest had ruptured. Her doctor was out of town and I guess others who communicated with him decided Carrie needed to stay in the hospital under close observation until he returned. She was in a room that usually only allowed visitors for a few minutes every few hours. The nurses and staff again were wonderful. We sort of camped out in the room with Carrie and they didnt mind. On the fourth day, early in the morning her oncologist came in to see her. Carrie happened to be by herself in the room at the time and they had a long, long, tough talk. He told her that he had gone over the results of all the lab tests etc that had been done during her stay and he had come to the conclusion that there was nothing else he could do for her. He told her he felt it was time for her to sign up for hospice and that if she were his daughter his recommendation would be the same. When I returned to the hospital Earnest told me what had transpired. I really wasnt surprised. I was grateful they had had that conversation because I had been able to see she was declining and I was beginning to have a tough time with the new health insurance company getting the necessary medications quickly without a lot of red tape. I told Carrie that signing up for hospice did not mean that we were giving up on our faith. It only meant we were moving to a higher level of care.

Once she signed the consent forms things began to happen very quickly. The hospice people came to our home with a hospital bed with a special mattress, bedside potty chair, a new oxygen machine and extra tanks, a different wheelchair. They had things set up very quickly and efficiently. A hospice nurse had talked to us at the hospital to let us know what they would do for us and gave me a folder full of information to read over. I ran to the store to buy some pretty sheets and a blanket so the hospital bed would not look so out of place. It only helped a little.

When Miss Carrie arrived by Medi-Car she was sitting propped up on the gurney as they wheeled her in the house. She was so excited to be home. She looked in the bedroom, saw the hospital bed and said, Whats that for? The hospice nurse explained to her again that that was one of the requirements of their program. It would be much easier for them to provide care for her. She said, Im not sleeping in that! Im sleeping in my own bed! She politely crawled up into the bed she was accustomed to sleeping in. We propped her up with many pillows like a Princess and she began to receive her guests.

One by one her closest friends began to come by. They would all gather in the room and they would be laughing and giggling like teenagers at a slumber party. They had so much fun. Carrie grew weaker as the evening wore on and everyone left so she could spend some time with the kids and get some sleep. She slept in the regular bed. I slept in the hospital bed beside her.

On Sunday morning she woke up and I could tell something was very different. She talked about wanting to go to church but she was slurring her words and she barely had the strength to get up to the potty chair right beside the bed. She tried to get dressed but it wasnt working to well. Then she was just too exhausted and laid back to rest. Later on, after church was out we had some company. Our assistant pastor, one of our deacons and several members came by to have church with us at home. They brought communion for Carrie. We sang and shouted awhile. The deacon cradled Carrie in his arms and prayed like I had never heard before. There was not a dry eye in my home that Sunday afternoon. The Lord was in that place. As the minister gave communion Carrie leaned over real close to her face and whispered, Tell me one more time about the bread. Minister Whaley explained that the bread represented the body of Christ that had been broken for us. Carrie nodded and said, Oh yeah, now I remember. I AM REDEEMED and she drifted off. She never uttered another word and died about 9 hours later.

We have a saying at One Body In Christ Christian Church. When you know, that you know, that you know........ I know that my child saw the face of God the Sunday afternoon and He was welcoming her into his loving arms. It has given me peace in my heart that has comforted me and sustained me for the last year. As her birthday approaches and the 1st anniversary of her death I thank that same God for who He is and for what He has done for me in my life.